birthday rap contest

So teaching high school English can be a little boring. I've already read all of the material, it's dry, they don't get it, etc. Because of this, and because my birthday is on Friday (and I really don't want to be bored on my birthday) I came up with "Ms. L's birthday rap challenge"...

The requirements:
- The beat is Sean Kingston's "feel like letting go" and they have to change those words to "I feel like writing, oh" (I know, I know...)
- One simile
- One metaphor
- One example of personification
- One allusion to something we've read

So far we have similes comparing me to Edgar Allen Poe, references to our disciplinarian who may or may not hit students with his belt, and lines which take full advantage of the fact that I said it had to be PG-13 as opposed to G.

Stay tuned, as I'm going to try to post a video (or at least a youtube link) after the winner has been decided Friday.

It was also during this class that a student asked me when I was born. I always lie about this question, so I said "'76." She (VERY) seriously responded, "1876 or 1976?"

.........................

Well, I finally did it.

This past August, I made the jump from college student to New Orleans public school teacher. It was...quite a leap, to say the least, and I began recording tidbits from my daily life on Facebook. To my surprise, people were actually interested in what has become a fairly routine day in my high school classroom. I decided to create a blog to compile some of my favorite classroom moments, and to go by  the oh-so-endearing "Meanerley," just in case my administration happens to peruse blogspot... Enjoy...

I'll begin with some old favorites:

1. "Ms. L.. your face be all pale today. is it because you sick? or are you a virgin?" 
2. "Ms. L, you be lookin like a real classy model today. Like...classy enough to be on 'Bad Girls Club'
3. adjectives that describe Ms. L (written on my chalkboard): "disgusting, mean, SOOO mean, childish, loves homework, evil,    ballerina"
4. S1-"Wait, so in the Holocaust they took the gold crowns off of people's teeth?" Me- "Yes." S2- "Wait...so they had gold back in 1944?" Me- "Yes..." S3- "What about grillz?"
5. "does anyone know what 'euthenasia' means?" "uhh..that's my cousins name." 
6. "Ms. L? How do you see pictures of dead people online?"
7. text from student: "ms. L are you ok? your eyes were all like red and puffy and watery this morning.." so much for going out on school nights. 
8. "this lady's name should really be ms. meanerley..but she's probably a liar, too. she may have her looks..but this lady..she aint got a soul." (Hence, the name)
9. "ms. L, you ever seen abraham lincoln's sex tape?" "I am 1000% positive that abraham lincoln does not have a sex tape. " "so, you're admitting that you've searched for that sh*t!?"


Which brings us today....


10. "Ms. L, you know charles barkley married to a white lady?" "ya, I do actually.." "I bet they have crazy lookin babies" "no, their baby is one of my best friends actually.." "ms lierley you double lyin now. no way would charles barkleys baby be friends w someone as crazy as you."


I don't know who should be more offended, Christiana for being "crazy looking" or me, for being just plain crazy.